“When you get to the end of all the light you know and it’s time to step into the darkness of the unknown, faith is knowing that one of two things shall happen: either you will be given something solid to stand on, or you will be taught how to fly.” ― Edward Teller

 

What happens when we have had a dream for many, many years, and we are on the edge of it becoming our reality?  In 2008, God had had enough of my egotistical check-writing-conscious-soothing ways and the presence of a call to ministry became so incessant and apparent, that I managed to say the words out loud to myself, and then to my pastor.

Two weeks ago, I graduated from three years of study at the Iliff School of Theology.

This past weekend, my appointment to serve a church was announced.

This week, I am putting all of my stuff into cardboard boxes and plastic bins, getting ready to move to a new town and to begin servant ministry.

It seems I am actually in danger of achieving a dream that dates back to 1991, when I spent a few months working in the Middle East.  A time and place where I saw things that remain fresh and real in my memory, things that I can’t un-see to this day.  It was my first experience in a country with an “emerging economy.”  At that time, there were one million people living in the cemetery because there was no housing for them, no jobs, no respect.  Many others lived in cobbled together shacks, no running water, no sanitation facilities.  Children played barefoot in the spaces between, and I will leave it to the imagination what else was done in those spaces.   On the streets of Cairo, women begged for a pittance from the thousands of tourists passing by.  Often, their babies lay nearby, sometimes naked, but rarely crying, already adapted to lives that lie ahead.

I came home from that adventure with two things – stomach “crud” that lasted several months, and a sense of call to serve.  For the next 17 years, I would drive by Iliff and say to myself, “that’s where I want to be” while I managed to push down that call by volunteering and making donations.

There are many quotations and sayings about working toward the dreams we dream; about pursuing that about which we feel passionate.  Who knew how incredibly freaky and scary it is to achieve one’s dreams, to take that step into what’s next and live that dream?

 “I believe there’s a calling for all of us. I know that every human being has value and purpose. The real work of our lives is to become aware.  And awakened.  To answer the call.” ― Oprah Winfrey

It’s time to be awakened and to answer the call.   I better get these boxes packed.